Important manners everyone must know before age 10

Today’s world is considered are global village hence we are not limited to only what happens our immediate environment but also what happens elsewhere. We are expected to think globally and act locally but there are certain values which are considered global. In this piece I try to put together certain deeds that make people around us feel like human beings.

Say please: Saying please when requesting others to do something for you is a sure way to getting them to do it even if they don’t feel like it. Saying please shows the other person that you respect them and that you are not using them as a means to achieve your goal.

I am sorry: As human as we are, we are imperfect. From time to time we offend the people around us. Learning to say sorry and saying it at the right time helps to sustain the relationship we have with people we may have offended. Some people think that by saying sorry we are demeaning ourselves but rather the opposite happens. It tells the person you have offended that you have a fellow feeling and that you care about how they feel. When we offend other people, in most cases is the person at the receiving end of the offence who suffers because it is the ego that is hurt. By refusing to say sorry you make them go through moments of emotional pain and loss of self-respect.

Say thank you: Saying thank you is one the most important etiquette every human being can learn. Since we are interdependent on each other, it is the case that people will offer you services that you may not be able to offer yourself. Saying thank you for such deed tells the other person that you appreciate what they have done for you and that they are one of a kind. By refusing to say thank you, you are not only considered as ungrateful but also you deny others of the opportunity to experience the similar favour from your benefactor and other people who will be informed of your ungratefulness. 

Always lend help if you can: Make it part of your plan every day to at least give help to one person who cannot pay you back either in kind or in cash. When we are kind to others merely due to the fact that they can pay us back then we have already received our reward here on earth. The Bible makes it emphatically clear in Ephesians 6:8  “Knowing that whatever good anyone does, this he will receive back from the Lord, whether he is a slave or free”. This means that the good we do unto others will come back to us in equal measure pressed down and shaken but the motive for doing good must not be because we will receive reward since it makes us selfish.

Give your seat to others: Growing up as a kid, it was highly distasteful for a child to sit whiles an adult stood. Children were expected to give their seats to adults. The only condition under which an adult stood and a child sat was on health grounds or if the adult refused the offer but these days that culture is gradually changing. Young people don’t deem it necessary to offer such gestures to adults. This is a clear indication that we care less about each other.

Learn to pronounce people’s name correctly: The sweetest words for everyone is their name. Most people find it very offensive when their names are pronounced wrongly. A good rule of thumb is to ask the person to pronounce their name to you. That way the chances that you will make mistakes are minimized.

Pay attention: In this day and age where we are surrounded by technology, it a common sight to see people not paying attention during conversations. The average person has one of these three devices; a phone, tablet or a PC and is on various social media platforms. This means that people are increasingly engaged in virtual conversations. Platforms like Whatapp and Facebook can be very addictive and hence make us spend less and less time with our loved ones. These devices and platforms are good but we need to manage them otherwise they will manage us. Texting and whatsapping has created problems for some marriage couples. A good rule will be to agree with your partner that phones are not allowed in bed.

Don’t interrupt others when they are speaking. Not training your child not to get into conversations they are not invited to can be very embarrassing at times for parents. Sometimes parents are not discrete about sensitive conversations at home. They allow children to sit around whiles such conversations are going on thinking that they are not listening to what is going on. Children being inquisitive listen in on these conversations and blow the whistle at unusual place causing parents a lot of embarrassment.  

Excuse me. Learning to say excuse me when it matters is very important. It will prevent you from making unwanted enemies.

Avoid bad comments about others. Always learn to say good things about other people. If you don’t have anything good to say, don’t talk. Learning to love others as yourself will help you not to fall into this trap and also avoiding the company of people who are always speaking evil of others helps a lot. Remember, they will say the say the things about you in your absence.

5 websites that can change your life

Many of us go online every day to read news and access other information. Sometimes the net can be a boring platform if you don’t really know where to find good stuff that will enhance your knowledge and make you a better person. In this post, I am going to share with you some websites that will make your time online more useful and productive.

Coursera, is a one stop website for hundreds of courses delivered by expects from around the world. The good news is that it is for free. If you have the desire to educate yourself but don’t have the financial resources to help you accomplish that feat then your problems are over. All you need is high speed internet and the time. You can participate in courses moderated by top notch professors from ivy league schools and other educational institutions around the world. Udacity, Khanacademy and EdX are three other sites that operate like coursera. Another good thing about these courses is that you get to meet other people from all over the world with whom you can form partnerships and share ideas. You can even get a certificate to show you partook in such a course if you carry out all assignments given for the duration of the course.

YouTube is a video streaming website that streams both live and recorded videos. It is a fantastic site in the sense that it has helped many people to expose their talent to the world. For instance musician Justin Bieber became a star because his parents were able to use the youtube platform to give him free exposure. They recorded his guitar playing skills and posted it on youtube and within a matter of hours, many people saw the talent that this young chap had. In the end it culminated with him getting a contract with a major record label and the rest is history. Youtube has been my top website for learning new you stuffs or anything I am ignorant about. I will particularly encourage teachers to visit the site since it has videos of most of the things taught in the classroom which may be abstract. It is also a place where upcoming businesses can advertise their products for free by doing a short video of their product and uploading it. Many footballers have used this platform to advertise the footballing skills to the rest of the world.

Ted website contains thousands of inspiring speeches on relevant issues around the world. Most of these are short speeches of individuals who are making a difference in their carriers and communities. These speeches are from people who are role models and an example to their generation. Such individuals such as former Vice-President Al Gore, BBC anchor Komla Dumor, Microsoft founder Bill Gates and his wife Melinda, Sir Ken Robinson, ace investigative journalist Anas Aremeyaw Anas, Bono, author Malcolm Gladwell etc have all used the ted platform to share with the world. These inspiring speeches are recorded and uploaded from ted conferences which are held around the world.

Alltop is a web aggregator that gathers news on all subjects from archeology to zoology. If you want to read news articles on a specific subject, then that should be the website of choice for you. For instance, if you want news on specific subject such as project management, education, gaming or babies all at one place then just visit this site and click on the appropriate alphabet that begins the issue  you are looking for and read news articles from all over the world on that issue.

The BBC website in my opinion is the most comprehensive and detailed website ever. Most people think it is only a news website but there is a lot more to that site than just news. It is a news websites as well as a learning website for kids especially those doing the GCSE syllabus which might be similar to many other syllabuses for kids around the same age in other parts of the world. It has hundreds of podcast of BBC programs on various issues like technology, culture, parenting, science, auto, religion and many more.

11 unwritten rules of success

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough― Mae West. Life can be very tough and challenging at times but we always have to keep on fighting ahead. Knowing some things very early in life will help you to avoid certain mistakes. This write-up is a guide to help you in your effort at succeeding in life. I am a very young person and may not know it all but I pray the following points aid you in your effort to succeed in the journey of life and achieve your God given purpose in life.

Show respect to everyone. Everyone is gifted in one way or the other. Therefore if some is bad at a task, it doesn’t mean the person is good for nothing. There are so many other ways that this same person could be useful. One the most embarrassing things that can happen to you is for someone you disrespected to show you the way on an issue.

Live within your means. Try as much as possible to budget the resources you have and live within it. If you have to borrow money, use it for something that will yield profit. Living within your means does not mean you should go for cheap stuff. Sometimes, cheap things end up been very expensive in the end. For example, if you want to buy a car, all things being equal for the same brand of car, a 2008 model will be better than a 2002 model. The question is if you can’t afford the 2008 model but can do with the 2002 model which in the end results in the mechanic becoming your friend because of the frequency of your visits to his shop then what is the point. It is sometimes better to go out of your means to borrow an interest free loan from a friend or family member to purchase the 2008 model since its maintenance cost is low and will save you money in the end.

Be faithful and committed to whatever you are involved in. The reason why most employers will select someone with first class over another with second class or third class is not because the one with the first class is necessarily better but because his grades are a sign that he takes whatever he does seriously. So your ultimate reference in life not your former boss but how  dilligently you carried out previous work.

Commit to lifelong learning. Education is the investment with the highest yield. Earning a single degree can reap you returns for life. Get a master’s degree, a professional certification and most importantly keep reading books to enhance your understanding of new issues and get more knowledge. Attend conferences on personal development and on areas where you have practically no idea. Your introduction to a new area could be the beginning of success. Try reading one book every week or read an article a day to enhance your knowledge.

Observe the Pareto (10\10\80) Principle. For every amount you earn, put 10% into an investment instrument, tithe the next 10% and live within the next 80%. If you can, you can increase the amount to 20/10/70 as this will speed up your effort to become financially independent. Being financially independent will help you achieve and overcome so many obstacles in life. Money is not everything but it makes the world go round.

Network, network, network. Have you heard the saying that “you are three people away from connecting with that person you look up to”. It is important that we continue to get to know more people as the days go by. The reason basically is that you need people to help you to solve the problems around you and the more people you know, the more the likelihood that you will bump into one of them when you are in need.

Believe in higher authority. It is dangerous to live in this world and think that the world just came into being by some magical or scientific means. Believing in a higher authority (God) makes it easy for you to humble yourself since we are all where we are by his Grace. Whatever you believe in, always do unto others what you expect them to do unto you. This is a universal principle and you don’t need to attend church to reap its benefits.

Take time to travel. Travelling allows you to get to know at firsthand what is going on around you and reduces your over reliance on the media for information which may have been blown out of proportion. It also helps you to develop different perspectives on cultures and help you to relate with people from all spheres of life. If you cannot afford to travel abroad, you can begin by exploring your own country. Once you are done with that, then you could consider travelling outside your country. This demands careful planning and preparation both financially and a bit of reading here and there about your possible destination. Setting up a special account for this purpose and saving a little amount every month for that trip will be very helpful.

Maintain a good circle of friends and never cut off relationship completely with any of them no matter what unless your life or reputation is at risk. Remember your friends are human beings and they also have their own short comings. It is likely that they will offend you but always do well to forgive them. If you find it difficult to forgive your friends when they offend you, assume that they are your siblings and people don’t normally do away with their siblings forever. The point is you never know what situation you may find yourself in tomorrow and that person you cut off would have provided the needed help.

Develop a strategic life plan. A Strategic life plan is like a business plan for your life. It is a guided process by which an individual takes stock of his or her life, clarifies goals and challenges, identifies the steps needed to move forward and connecting the mind with the goals. It is important for you to plan your life, putting in place a 5 year strategic plan of how your life will look like in 2018 and working towards it challenges you to work hard at it. That plan should be holistic entailing how your social, career and religious life will be and putting in place measures to work towards that using the resources you have. Remember that life is how you make it and we are an embodiment of the decisions we make in life.

Fail forward. So much as we all dread failure; it can be a good thing. At the beginning of the 2013/2014 English Premier League season, my favourite team Arsenal suffered a massive 3-1 defeat at home to Aston Villa in their first game. There was huge out cry from the fans with some even calling for the head of our coach Arsene Wenger. Check the league table today and you will notice they are lying comfortably at the summit of the table. This story should tell you that failing is not as important as how you respond to it. Show me a man who has not experienced failure and I will show you a man who has not achieved. So what is the best thing to do what you experience failure? Sit back, relax and assess yourself and identify the mistakes you made that caused you to fail and make sure you rectify them in your endeavors ahead and success will certainly follow. When failure comes don’t give but rise again and fail forward but most important learn the lessons.

DEALING WITH SCREENAGERS

A screenager is a term used to describe teenagers who spend too much time in front of the screen (television or computer screens) and your child may just be in this category. Many parents are concerned about the impact of these tech gadgets in the lives of their children.

The internet has become an important tool in the education and upbringing of kids today. Through the guided use of the internet children will cultivate the habit of learning independently. Their ability to use sites like Google will aid them in doing their homework and learning other things on their own thereby reducing their over reliance you.

It is a fact that broadband is expensive in most part of the world but nothing good is achieved on a platter of gold. There are so many useful websites that kids can use to supplement their learning at school. Sites like khanacademy, graphite, bbcbitesize, wonderopolis, pbskids are very useful in this direction. Parenting also has these ten sites which can aid children in the edutainment. Some may argue that the use of the internet by children comes with its own consequences but so does every good thing. The important thing is for parents to regulate its use and make sure children are using it for the purpose for which they secured it for them. They can achieve this by making it a point to always check the browsing history of their kids and also blocking certain sites which may be harmful to them.

Cyber bullying is on the increase and so parents have to be very vigilant about when their kids do online. Because of the emergence of social media platforms like Facebook, Myspace, Twitter, Instagram of which children are a part, they get exposed to strangers and bullies very early in the lives. In recent times some children have committed suicide because their colleagues bullied them using such cyber platforms.

 One sure thing parents can do is to teach children about digital citizenship and also be a role model since they are likely to visit your page on social media platform. If they visit your page online and realize that you are putting out nonsense, they sure will follow suit.   

Parents can also create an account on these platforms and befriend their kids and set rules concerning responsible use of the internet whose punishment is taking them completely of the net if the go contrary to these rules. This way you have access to their wall and will be able to know if anyone is trying to hurt them using the cyber platform.

Educate kids about privacy settings on social media and have them log into Facebook Twitter, Google+ and check their privacy settings. One good way to stay safe online is to set their profiles to private so that only people they invite can see their post. When an account is set up on social media everything is public by default and kids may not know who is seeing the information they post online it therefore behooves on caring parents to help their kids to manually edit their privacy setting by using the settings tab.

Educate them about the danger of posting certain sensitive information online and advise them not to give out personal information to strangers online. For example it is important for them to know that the less selfies the put on line the better. They should also not advertise their location online as this could lead to a breach of their personal security.

Encourage them to create a strong password which is normally a combination of letters, alphabets and symbols and change them after every three months. They should desist from using their date of birth or the pet name as a password. The best password is forming a sentence that you can easily remember and using it as your password.

A more radical approach to controlling your kids online will be to agree with kids less than sixteen years to have access to their passwords if they want to create an account on social media otherwise they should not be allowed join such platforms. Though some may see this as overly intrusive of parents, you will agree with me that it is better to invade your child’s privacy than for them to commit suicide because there was no supervision of their activities online.

It is also important for parents to set time limits on how long their kids can spend online. Some children spend so much time such that they end up becoming antisocial. Kids need to balance their the online life with real world activities.